Jamon Jamon
Where the men eat jamon and women eat men
What motivated my decision to work with Bigas is a simple fact. This movie came out from the mixture of mad temperature, spicy food, alcohol and constant view of naked, Spanish bodies.
For these few deluxe items, you cannot do anything but become a hungry animal
– confesses Siniarska licking her lips coloured by red chanel lipstics –
Why not, from time to time, after exclusive meal, to loose ourselves in elementary animal sexuality. Entering the body through mouth, penetration, the open, causes so violent and exciting disorder, that great happiness resembles not so much pleasure, as its opposite, great suffering. The movement of love, because everything what I touch, what I do I connect with love, the movement of love taken to the last limits of motion can be mortal. In the end it just might be the reason why so many people killed themselves because of me or more, asked me to be killed by me, should I mention - in a very cruel way? Cruelty wasn’t my choice, of course, it was a gift for all these suffering hearts, a sacrifaction of mine ethics. Without Judas there wouldn’t be resurrection. Without me there wouldn’t be pleasure of love.
Perversion is everything what disguists human beings. Ahhh, I love it! Disguist to myself is the pick of experience in my subjectivity. To be close to disguist – to smell it, to see it, touch it..the tactile sensation of slime , ooze and wriggly, slithery, creepy things. In the end we are born between the dung and urine.
I know I can afford on everything.
Many years ago I was the vixen. At the end of my tailbone I had a tail, fluffy, flexible antenna in silver-white color. The tail could be bigger and smaller: at rest is 10-15 centimeters, such as medium-sized penis, in a state activity might reach 1 meter length ( here compare to men's erections would not carry out ). Tail in my life was playing a special role, it was the antenna, via which the body creates the illusion. With it I was bringing darkness. The illusion could have various nature, depends on the individual properties of vixes, her imagination, spiritual strength and specific traits. As a prostitute, I created an illusion of sexual intercourse, to give a chance to people to go as far as I went in my sexual love fantasies but what was my biggest disappointment - men are too simple for that, they want nothing but cheap images, almost the same positions ( exposing only obvious parts of the body ), the same environment ( domestic situations, welcome in tropics...), cheap stories, typical "beauty" with eliminating personality ( check www.pornporn.com ), zero level of secret, fantasy.. just to consume...no play, no game, no ambiguity, german sausage on the alexander platz. Why? Men don’t understand that animality is a sophisticated approach towards sexuality the same as it is needed towards aesthetics but what they want …. I will not go into details, it is sad to look at your man-victim when he reflects on his fantasies and is alone in the ring. This was the reason I stopped to be vixen, I couldn’t stand men and their poor sexual desires.
In fact, I liked men ( this is not a task for Wittgenstein ), I liked to associate with them even though they are biological failure but I didn’t care that much about that, even if I had to deal with their frustration that they will never become a woman ( men’s gene Y that has incomplete amount of chromosomes will never reach the level of women’s gene X ).
I still love from time to time to objectify myself. Why not. I love to expose myself in relation to the masculine gaze ( after all objectification is a personification of an object ). To objectify myself not only as a bitch but above all as a non-human. It’s fascinating to be non-human!
I can give myself out to the left and right and pretend generousity. I can shake my head like Jackie Kennedy Onnasis and open my eyes in surprise, in her favorite pose. I can tweet as firstclass mate girl. I can afford it all, why not?
White vixen, I was always tasteful, whoever and whatever I became.
Becoming-animal is only one of my becomings amongs others. All my becomings! Intense, becoming-animal, becoming-imperceptible. Becoming and multiplicity are the same thing. A multiplicity is not defined by its elements, nor by a center of unification or comprehension. It is defined by the number of dimensions it has. It is not divible, it cannot lose or gain a dimension without changing its nature. Miltiplicity is continually transforming itself into a string of other multiplicities. Each multiplicity is simbiotic, its becoming ties together animals, plants, microorganisms, mad particles, whole galaxy,
I have an ability to change/swap the functions of individual body parts with other . I don't need to constitute my content.
I am insatiable in my transformation but I will never ever become a woman in love. I will never ever become a goddess…I prefer to be cyborg than a goddess.