AGATA TERESA SINIARSKA
mujer demoníaca DEMONIC WOMAN
METAPHYSICAL MADNESS
Yesterday one of the reporter of Hola! Magazine found himself behind the waredrobe in Siniarska's attic, observing her metaphysical madness:
Heterosexsual relationship with a man is a shopping center! Only consumption, production of love! That we – women are a production line for men! Can I consume you, please? The shopping center where the love is produced by social practices economically orientated. All services that are offered are very attractive at first glance. And true! All of them are so true, so real, feelings that are delivered to me and their personal involvment. FUCK IT!
Somehow this model is not covered with this promise of happiness in my life plans, that I had before.
I was cheating myself definitely too long but my desires are regulated by mens heterosexual manipulation that they called female subjectivity. I can't believe! But, yes, that's true...ahhh...everything becomes so complex, what is love and where is it wandering...this becomes so COMPLEX! That you have to enter this complexity! To get something out of love! No, men's love is not normal!
„Love me woman, that's what I need looking at myself in the mirror” and voila – you have your relationship.
Shut up!
„You must have personal relation towards me and that's why I can put into realization my heterosexual desires!”
I loved, I loved them fiercely, like a lion, I loved them truely and what? Fuck, I even still love. And what?
Antonioni – absolutist of self-love, and self-indulgence, believing that open-relationship means open-minded
Tarkovsky – oscilation between perversion and classicism
Bardem - unfulfilled promises of life in itself
Enough! From now on I play only in Leni Riefenstahl's movies, even if it's against the feelings towards my country.
Heterosexual men. Gang of manipulators. Shouting only – love me love me love me love me if I don't love you love me if I'm not engage in, I'm not here and there. Love me because I won't do it. Love me above all and involve in this love all your life and all your feelings! Not me, just you because you are the fucking woman and women here HAVE TO PLAY THE ROLE OF BEING INVOLVED!
Everyone wants from me personal involvement, real me. Everyone wants from me everything like I would be a box of christmas wishes.
Love and be loyal to this love! Love me with your real love! AND WHERE ARE MY NEEDS!?!
This is what men want, that I will be truly involved in love to them, to heterosexual relationship, that I will be in my feelings real.
Fine, so I prefer to be artificial!
And what? Does any Blade Runner control if my personal life is sacrified to love? Does he control if my involvement is real? In this shopping center? Ok, great, let him to come here! Let Blade Runner or any personnel manager or sales manager comes here and then we see! We see if the feelings performed by me are enough huge for men's ego, or not! And why Blade Runner cannot come here to check men!?! No! Because he's also a man!
Perform huge feelings towards your man! AND DON'T EXPECT THAT HE WILL WORRY ABOUT YOUR NEEDS! Life is short baby, come back to your production line!
Men! Conquistadors! All of you are like primitive cattle with this difference that theoretizied your heterosexual primitivism, you make women believe this is the only philosophy. But your philosophy is a humbug, intelectual shortcuts of Papuans. Nietzsche – impotent, life philosopher for slouches, wishful to drug themselves by anything, any trash, helpless towards women's power. Lacan who deprived us of pleasure.
Men, liberalism and SNDO, all of them want me to be engaged for nothing, not even for KISS MY ASS but I don't want to be like that.
Actually I'm not agressive at all.
No, I'm not! As a matter of fact, I'm a very nice girl!
I'm a very nice, quite nice technology connected to electric cables. To feel strong love, to feel real involvement towards a man! I really don't know what to do with this shit. And suddenlly these fractions appear and I must feel strong love again, show my involvement towards men!
Heterosexual relationship killed me. Surounded by crowds of admirers that didn't give me anything. Promises are not avant-garde enough! Be my ephemerical godness! To run away from them I hit the headlines on Vogue covers. There everyone could have me and I didn't feel it at all. Yes!
My destiny won't be weighted on the spoon when man doesn't like the soup.
I'm inteligent, extraordinary, beautiful and almighty. I am the fact positive. I create in steel like any minimalist. I sit to grand piano and play like the most talented musician. I create such a combinations of tones! Compering to this Grosse Fugue is just a simple piece for four hands. I'm dialectician. I am philosopher and still good Christian.
I'm not afraid of death.
I don't believe in physics. This is just a mathematic schema of grasping phenomenon for men's simple brains. Simple brains that stucked on the border of the possibility to create mataphysics. But life has no borders. Life is not a shopping centre offering services men's love economy and I will cross these borders. I will grab the life once again. I will not capitulate, even to myself.
Fake it utill you make it!
Truth, truth, does anybody notice that truth has a structure of fiction?
Woman as lover, woman desiring, my real symbolic title! Well - kiss my ass! I challenge it! I call it into question! Down with prosthesis-phalluses.
I need to save myself from this what/who I desire!
I don't want men's love anymore! I WANT TO HAVE A DOG!
to be continued